While I was the pastor of Christ United Methodist Church in Deerfield in the 2000s, we joined Lake County United, which organized groups like churches, synagogues, and unions to work for change in our communities.

One of LCU’s organizers was a man named Tom Lenz and I’ll never forget the day in my office when he challenged me to do ten one-on-ones over one summer. I had been to a seminar about community organizing, but still wasn’t 100 percent sure how to do a one-on-one and the thought of doing 10 was a little daunting. How does it work? What do I say? Will it be weird? What exactly is a one-on-one again?

I’m grateful that Tom didn’t let me off the hook and gave me the courage to take on the challenge. It forever changed my ministry. I made a list of people who might have interesting insights about the community, including a school principal, the mayor, and a local restaurant owner. Not everyone wanted to meet with me (the manager of the Barnes & Noble was suspicious), but most of the people I reached out to gladly met with me and I learned a lot about the community.

My most interesting meeting was with the director of the local public library. As I was asking him some of the questions that I asked others (“What are you passionate about? What keeps you up at night?”), I also asked him, “Are there any particular books or subjects that people are asking about recently?” He responded, “Actually, we’ve been getting more inquiries about parenting children through a divorce.”  

That was a big aha moment for me and got me thinking about how our church might be a place to help parents and children who are going through divorce. I would never have known that if I hadn’t had that meeting.

It might seem a little intimidating to reach out to a stranger in your community, but it’s one the most simple and powerful things you can do. And it’s free (unless you buy the other person coffee)! Rev. Trey Hall is the director of evangelism and growth for The Methodist Church in Britain and has written a superb article about why and how one-on-one meetings are crucial to congregational
development. You can read it here.

Just as Tom Lenz challenged me, I’d like to challenge you. I know Lent is a busy time, but how about you try to schedule four one-on-ones during Lent—4 for 40 Days? I’m happy to help give ideas about how you might get started.  

I recommend that you start with a librarian.